Dating is fun. I mean is there a better thrill than finding someone to go on adventures with? Especially when they just get you.
But everything isn’t a Hallmark movie where everything is perfect and the bad guy is as obvious as his bad dye job.
They seem so sweet up until they’re not. It’s a total Jekyll and Hyde move and they can be easily spotted just keep an eye out these huge creepo signs and here are some helpful tips to keep you safe.
Don’t let them know where you live or the location of your job…yet
You can state a general area like “I live over by university” or “I do IT work.” That’s fine but if you just met this guy and it’s like date 3 or 4, he doesn’t need to know every single detail of your life to the T. Leave the intimate details to yourself until you know this guy better, and seen him angry. Most importantly if you can drive then drive especially if its the first date. Remember, YOU DON’T KNOW THIS GUY!!!
Slow Things Down
Don’t move in after 3 months, I know rent is a killer but he might actually harm you. In my own opinion moving in with someone knowing them less than a year is just not responsible. People lie, you don’t know how their finances really are. Maybe they’ve hidden a drinking or gambling problem or maybe they’re just crazy. You can’t really tell in 3 months, or 4 months. TAKE YOUR TIME! Don’t get caught up with being in love get through the honeymoon phase before you make lifelong plans.
Texting first isn’t chasing but if he hasn’t responded after 3 or 4 texts. Girl just stop. Don’t force it, this is bad not only for your self-esteem but it’s just not a good look and could put you in a bad situation if he’s a jerk. Just let it go.
Now to the flags. These are the warning signs that the guy might be potentially dangerous.
🚩He doesn’t like the fact that you go out
It’s one thing if he doesn’t like that you go out every night, that’s understandable when you’re in a relationship. However, if you and your friends go to a cafe for brunch every Sunday and he gets upset or angry when you go for no good reason. That’s a sign he might have some trust issues.
🚩Constantly Tells You To Change Your Clothes
Now it’s one thing if you’re wearing a size too small or the shirt is so thin you can see you’re nipples. But if every time you’re looking good and feeling your self and he says you look terrible, like a slut, or asks if you’re looking for someone else, and it’s a serious question. It’s a flag, he should want you to feel confident and beautiful, if he constantly puts you down it’s time to go.
🚩Tries to keep you away from people.
I’m talking about events like family reunions, or people can’t come over, you can’t go out for drinks with your coworkers. He probably wants to keep you to himself and not in a cuddly way. Abusers typically try to keep their victims isolated as a better means to control them. Mom should always be welcomed over, whether they like it or not.
Guys like this are predators, they’ll cry, beg, plead, even get mad. Don’t fall for this, if you have a gut feeling something isn’t right it probably isn’t. It’s better to be single for a while then in something potentially dangerous. If you’re in a harmful or abusive relationship there are ways to get help please follow the link (HERE) for resources you can also call RAINN (800) 656 HOPE (4673)